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00:00:01,468 --> 00:00:05,782
♪ Thank you for being a friend
2
00:00:05,806 --> 00:00:09,786
♪ Traveled down the
road and back again
3
00:00:09,810 --> 00:00:11,254
♪ Your heart is true
4
00:00:11,278 --> 00:00:15,146
♪ You're a pal and a confidante
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♪ And if you threw a party
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♪ Invited everyone you knew
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♪ You would see the
biggest gift would be from me
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♪ And the card
attached would say
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♪ "Thank you for
being a friend" ♪
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Why do these things
always happen to me?
11
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I'm just a wreck. I don't
know what I'm going to do!
12
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Blanche, we go through
this every morning.
13
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Now, admit it,
you have cellulite.
14
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I am not talking about
cellulite... which I don't have.
15
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I am talking about my daughter,
Janet. I just got off the phone with her.
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She's having marital troubles.
Oh, Blanche, I'm so sorry.
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But they've decided to
try and work things out,
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so they're going to Hawaii
for a second honeymoon.
19
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Well, sounds like they're trying
to work it out. Why are you upset?
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Don't you listen?
She has cellulite.
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Those are dimples.
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Dimples are on these cheeks! Ma!
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I am upset because, while
they're in Hawaii for two weeks,
24
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they're leaving my
14-year-old grandson with me!
25
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Oh, Blanche, that's
wonderful news!
26
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Why, you shouldn't be upset.
27
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No, I should be upset.
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How am I supposed to
study for my French final
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with a 14-year-old in the house?
30
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It's hard enough
with an 80-year-old!
31
00:02:04,491 --> 00:02:06,669
Are you referring to
me? Of course not, Ma.
32
00:02:06,693 --> 00:02:11,540
I'm referring to Cary Grant.
He's living in the broom closet.
33
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Hey, it's Blanche's
grandson. We do for family.
34
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You're right, Ma. You're
right. I'm just being selfish.
35
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Oh, it probably won't be
too bad. No, I suppose not.
36
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But whatever will we do
with him for two weeks?
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There are plenty of
things to do down here.
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We can take him to Disney
World, the Seaquarium,
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the Everglades, Rambo... Rambo?
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The movie with Sly Stallone.
41
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I sat through it
twice. You'll love it!
42
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He sweats like a pig and
he doesn't put his shirt on!
43
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It's not gonna work.
I'm not sharing my room.
44
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Oh, Ma, Ma, I'm not thrilled
with the arrangement, either.
45
00:02:53,840 --> 00:02:56,519
But for the two weeks that
David is here, we'll make do.
46
00:02:56,543 --> 00:02:59,321
Sure, it's easy for you.
I'm not the one who snores.
47
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I do not snore.
48
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Please! I'll bet less
disgusting noises
49
00:03:04,484 --> 00:03:06,517
come out of Ernest Borgnine!
50
00:03:09,155 --> 00:03:11,300
I just fixed a special
treat for David.
51
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It's the same little after-school
snack I used to make for my own son...
52
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A triple-decker BLT
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and a hearty helping of
homemade potato salad,
54
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and a great big slice of
double chocolate fudge cake.
55
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Oh, where was he going
after school, the electric chair?
56
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Oh, girls!
57
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What's the matter?
Where's David?
58
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I don't know where he
is. He wasn't on the plane.
59
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Come on, Dorothy. I'll help you
move your things back to your room.
60
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Oh, Ma. Please!
61
00:03:36,516 --> 00:03:39,261
Come on, Blanche. Now,
calm down. Calm down.
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00:03:39,285 --> 00:03:42,164
He probably missed the
plane. It can happen to anyone.
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00:03:42,188 --> 00:03:45,401
I missed a plane
once... and a train...
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00:03:45,425 --> 00:03:48,805
Rose, you miss a lot of things.
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He got on the plane, all
right. I checked with the airline.
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Well, you probably just
missed each other at the airport.
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Dorothy, I was
standing there at the gate
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from the moment the
first passenger got off.
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I paged him. I checked with
airport security. I called the police.
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00:04:01,875 --> 00:04:04,242
Oh.
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00:04:07,413 --> 00:04:09,826
David, oh, David! Grandma!
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Is this your kid? Honey,
what happened to you?
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It wasn't my fault, I promise.
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He stowed away in the airplane
lavatory when they landed in Miami
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and the authorities picked him
up in the duty-free shop in Freeport.
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You went to the Bahamas?
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I went to the bathroom!
The next thing I know,
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I'm in the Bahamas. And
I figured while I was there,
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I'd buy some perfume for you and
your friends in the duty-free shop.
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David. I'd keep an
eye on this one, lady.
81
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Oh, I don't know how
to thank you, officer,
82
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but I would like to try.
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00:04:39,279 --> 00:04:42,491
I'm usually at Wally's for
happy hour on Tuesdays.
84
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Blanche!
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Ma'am.
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Bye.
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00:04:50,691 --> 00:04:53,836
David. I ought to give
you a good talking-to,
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but I'm just so glad you're all right, I'm
willing to overlook this little incident.
89
00:04:57,297 --> 00:04:59,275
Now, come on, I want
you to meet my friends.
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00:04:59,299 --> 00:05:01,610
Hello, David. I'm Dorothy.
91
00:05:01,634 --> 00:05:04,213
This is Rose. Hello, David.
92
00:05:04,237 --> 00:05:06,683
Hey, what's happening?
This is Sophia.
93
00:05:06,707 --> 00:05:09,251
Oh, we've just been
so anxious to meet you!
94
00:05:09,275 --> 00:05:12,288
Yeah, I'll believe that if you
believe the Bahamas story.
95
00:05:12,312 --> 00:05:15,158
You know, David, I went
to the Bahamas once.
96
00:05:15,182 --> 00:05:20,296
Oh, yeah? Was it on the Niña,
the Pinta, or the Santa Maria?
97
00:05:20,320 --> 00:05:25,702
It was a DC-10. I don't
think it had a name.
98
00:05:25,726 --> 00:05:27,904
Yeah, that's very funny, Rose.
99
00:05:27,928 --> 00:05:29,906
Yeah, I'm gonna
grab a bite to eat.
100
00:05:29,930 --> 00:05:31,841
I passed this burger
joint around the corner.
101
00:05:31,865 --> 00:05:33,375
Looked like there might
be some kids there.
102
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Oh, but David, wait a
minute. You just got here.
103
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Oh, I'd really
prefer you to stay.
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I planned a special
meal for you, David.
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Tomorrow. I love leftovers.
106
00:05:43,243 --> 00:05:47,023
Well, what time will you
be back? Hard to say.
107
00:05:47,047 --> 00:05:50,159
It depends how late the guys
from Miami Vice want to party.
108
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Later!
109
00:05:51,918 --> 00:05:54,330
Well, I don't believe that!
110
00:05:54,354 --> 00:05:57,088
But then, what can I
expect? His father's a Yankee.
111
00:05:58,825 --> 00:06:00,636
I guess I really should
have given him some money.
112
00:06:00,660 --> 00:06:02,872
You should have
given him a smack. Ma.
113
00:06:02,896 --> 00:06:04,941
I don't believe
in hitting children.
114
00:06:04,965 --> 00:06:10,747
Personally, I like to lay
into a kid with a melon baller.
115
00:06:10,771 --> 00:06:13,515
It's got a nice weight,
good balance in the hand,
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and it's portable.
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My father used to punish us by
sending us to the dairy barn to milk Alice.
118
00:06:20,346 --> 00:06:22,992
Well, what's so
terrible about that?
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You had to milk
Alice sitting on a stool.
120
00:06:25,551 --> 00:06:28,664
I thought you always milked
a cow sitting on a stool.
121
00:06:28,688 --> 00:06:31,923
No, no. Alice had
to sit on a stool.
122
00:06:34,294 --> 00:06:39,063
You see, she was involved
in this nasty plowing accident.
123
00:06:41,067 --> 00:06:43,045
It was during spring planting
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and Daddy had hitched
her up to the plow
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'cause poor old Toby had
gotten a fever and gone deaf.
126
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Rose, Rose, Rose...
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Sweetheart, save the story.
128
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When David comes back, tell him.
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00:06:55,982 --> 00:06:59,450
That can be his punishment.
130
00:07:27,447 --> 00:07:29,392
Ma, what are you doing?
131
00:07:29,416 --> 00:07:32,061
Living. Pardonnez-moi.
132
00:07:32,085 --> 00:07:35,097
I just can't study
with the noise!
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Fine. I'll stop breathing.
134
00:07:37,558 --> 00:07:40,136
Look, I haven't studied
since David arrived.
135
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My test is...
136
00:07:47,367 --> 00:07:51,313
My test is in two weeks
and I do not want to blow it.
137
00:07:51,337 --> 00:07:54,450
You'll pass, you'll pass. I
don't want to pass. I want an A.
138
00:07:54,474 --> 00:07:56,753
You're the same as you
were in grade school... A's.
139
00:07:56,777 --> 00:07:58,521
You always had to get an A.
140
00:07:58,545 --> 00:08:02,091
Your brother thought a book was
to sit on. You always had to get an A.
141
00:08:02,115 --> 00:08:03,793
Good night. Good night, Mom.
142
00:08:03,817 --> 00:08:07,218
If I breathe and it bothers
you, put a pillow over my face.
143
00:08:17,831 --> 00:08:20,877
How could I sleep
with that racket?
144
00:08:20,901 --> 00:08:22,912
What racket? Your pencil.
145
00:08:22,936 --> 00:08:25,114
My pencil? You're
pressing too hard.
146
00:08:25,138 --> 00:08:27,617
It's making me crazy!
147
00:08:27,641 --> 00:08:29,574
I give up.
148
00:08:37,417 --> 00:08:39,762
Look at me. What?
149
00:08:39,786 --> 00:08:41,965
You're getting a
cold. No, I'm not.
150
00:08:41,989 --> 00:08:43,967
Yes, you are. Tomorrow,
you'll have a cold.
151
00:08:43,991 --> 00:08:47,704
What is this, the
curse of the catwoman?
152
00:08:47,728 --> 00:08:50,039
I'm a mother. I
know these things.
153
00:08:50,063 --> 00:08:52,097
Good night, Ma. Good night.
154
00:09:04,978 --> 00:09:07,657
What's that smell?
155
00:09:07,681 --> 00:09:09,959
I don't smell anything.
156
00:09:09,983 --> 00:09:12,161
Are you wearing something?
157
00:09:12,185 --> 00:09:14,625
A little BenGay on my knees.
158
00:09:16,556 --> 00:09:19,036
A little Vicks on my chest.
159
00:09:22,262 --> 00:09:25,774
A little Deep Heat on my neck.
160
00:09:25,798 --> 00:09:30,146
What are you trying to do, pickle
yourself so you'll live to be 100?
161
00:09:30,170 --> 00:09:32,715
Fine, I'll wipe it off. Tomorrow,
I'll be in a wheelchair.
162
00:09:32,739 --> 00:09:35,240
Good night, Ma. Good night.
163
00:09:41,848 --> 00:09:44,368
Keep it up, I'll
need a Dramamine.
164
00:09:50,724 --> 00:09:53,503
I'm trying to get comfortable.
165
00:09:53,527 --> 00:09:57,106
Not me. You get too
comfortable, you don't wake up!
166
00:09:57,130 --> 00:09:59,464
Good night, Ma. Good night.
167
00:10:13,813 --> 00:10:15,624
Ma. What?
168
00:10:15,648 --> 00:10:19,262
That noise. What noise?
169
00:10:19,286 --> 00:10:21,764
The noise you're making
with your nose and throat.
170
00:10:21,788 --> 00:10:23,299
I got a postnasal drip.
171
00:10:23,323 --> 00:10:27,036
What would you like me
to do, drown in phlegm?
172
00:10:27,060 --> 00:10:29,394
Good night, Ma. Good night.
173
00:10:34,934 --> 00:10:38,281
You know, we haven't slept
together since I was a little girl.
174
00:10:38,305 --> 00:10:41,650
Thank God.
175
00:10:41,674 --> 00:10:45,854
I used to get into your bed whenever
I had that dream about the bear.
176
00:10:45,878 --> 00:10:49,691
Yeah... the bear dream.
177
00:10:49,715 --> 00:10:52,194
I hated that dream.
178
00:10:52,218 --> 00:10:54,485
A bear is eating
you. What's to love?
179
00:10:56,189 --> 00:10:58,701
You were so cute.
180
00:10:58,725 --> 00:11:01,771
You were always so
polite when you woke me.
181
00:11:01,795 --> 00:11:05,808
"Mommy, I'm having a bad dream.
182
00:11:05,832 --> 00:11:08,644
Could I come in?"
183
00:11:08,668 --> 00:11:11,013
I felt so safe with you.
184
00:11:11,037 --> 00:11:14,083
Listen, I felt safe with
you when you were three.
185
00:11:14,107 --> 00:11:18,621
And you always used to smell
from Midnight in Paris perfume.
186
00:11:18,645 --> 00:11:21,758
Better than this, huh?
187
00:11:21,782 --> 00:11:23,926
It sure was nice.
188
00:11:23,950 --> 00:11:26,629
It still is.
189
00:11:26,653 --> 00:11:30,121
Good night, Ma.
Good night, pussycat.
190
00:11:48,008 --> 00:11:50,141
What in the world
is going on here?
191
00:11:53,646 --> 00:11:56,225
David, I said, what in the
world is going on here?
192
00:11:56,249 --> 00:11:58,227
I thought you were in bed!
193
00:11:58,251 --> 00:12:00,596
I couldn't sleep, so I
went out and got a pizza.
194
00:12:00,620 --> 00:12:02,965
Made a few friends and
we decided to have a party.
195
00:12:02,989 --> 00:12:05,267
David, this is an inconvenience.
196
00:12:05,291 --> 00:12:07,336
I mean, it is 2:00
in the morning.
197
00:12:07,360 --> 00:12:09,193
Now please, ask your fr...
198
00:12:12,799 --> 00:12:14,710
friends to leave.
199
00:12:14,734 --> 00:12:18,180
Come on, girls.
Relax, loosen up!
200
00:12:18,204 --> 00:12:21,750
Hey, life's too short.
Especially for you guys.
201
00:12:21,774 --> 00:12:24,509
David! I'll get
the melon baller.
202
00:12:26,846 --> 00:12:28,591
Take it easy, ladies.
203
00:12:28,615 --> 00:12:30,893
Don't get your
support hose in a knot.
204
00:12:30,917 --> 00:12:34,062
That does it! The party is over!
205
00:12:34,086 --> 00:12:36,098
Everybody out, out!
206
00:12:36,122 --> 00:12:37,933
Not you. Out!
207
00:12:37,957 --> 00:12:40,335
It's really been lovely.
And if anything is missing,
208
00:12:40,359 --> 00:12:43,260
I will give your names
to every narc in this city.
209
00:12:44,697 --> 00:12:46,509
Oh!
210
00:12:46,533 --> 00:12:49,612
David, clean up this
mess, then go to bed.
211
00:12:49,636 --> 00:12:52,347
Hey, why don't you clean
up the mess yourself?
212
00:12:52,371 --> 00:12:55,250
I mean, what's the big deal?
We were just having some fun.
213
00:12:55,274 --> 00:12:58,754
You know that those happen to
be my friends you just threw out?
214
00:12:58,778 --> 00:13:00,723
You know, this really stinks.
215
00:13:00,747 --> 00:13:03,058
What am I supposed to
do for the next two weeks,
216
00:13:03,082 --> 00:13:05,293
just sit around and listen
to your arteries harden?
217
00:13:05,317 --> 00:13:07,930
You stop that!
218
00:13:07,954 --> 00:13:11,299
You know something? I am having
a real problem with your attitude!
219
00:13:11,323 --> 00:13:15,571
Oh, really? Well, you
can all just kiss my attitude!
220
00:13:15,595 --> 00:13:17,528
Ma.
221
00:13:21,434 --> 00:13:24,874
Well, you wouldn't let me get
the melon baller, so I improvised.
222
00:13:26,606 --> 00:13:29,652
Is that all you Italians know
how to do, scream and hit?
223
00:13:29,676 --> 00:13:33,778
No, we also know how to
make love and sing opera.
224
00:13:40,853 --> 00:13:43,432
Mom, you had
no right to hit him.
225
00:13:43,456 --> 00:13:47,335
Oh, Blanche, I'm so sorry.
She should not have done that.
226
00:13:47,359 --> 00:13:49,337
Well, I have to
go talk to David.
227
00:13:49,361 --> 00:13:51,495
I feel just awful about this.
228
00:13:54,968 --> 00:13:58,981
This is like The Long
Day's Journey Into Light.
229
00:13:59,005 --> 00:14:02,039
"Night," Rose. Night, Dorothy.
230
00:14:10,750 --> 00:14:13,695
David, are you all right?
231
00:14:13,719 --> 00:14:16,132
Yeah, I'm fine.
232
00:14:16,156 --> 00:14:18,636
It's just that nobody
ever hit me before.
233
00:14:20,760 --> 00:14:24,806
I think I should go home.
Oh, honey, you can't go home.
234
00:14:24,830 --> 00:14:28,411
There's nobody there to
take care of you. That's OK.
235
00:14:28,435 --> 00:14:32,848
I'd rather be there, alone,
than trapped here with you.
236
00:14:32,872 --> 00:14:36,785
Besides, I can
take care of myself.
237
00:14:36,809 --> 00:14:39,522
I've been doing it long enough.
238
00:14:39,546 --> 00:14:41,757
What do you mean?
239
00:14:41,781 --> 00:14:45,727
All Mom and Dad ever do is
fight. They don't even know I exist.
240
00:14:45,751 --> 00:14:48,597
Have you tried telling
them how you feel?
241
00:14:48,621 --> 00:14:50,188
They wouldn't listen.
242
00:14:52,459 --> 00:14:54,136
I'm listening.
243
00:14:54,160 --> 00:14:56,905
Yeah, only because they dumped
me on you and you feel you have to.
244
00:14:56,929 --> 00:14:58,774
No, David. Well,
you don't have to!
245
00:14:58,798 --> 00:15:00,731
Just leave me alone!
246
00:15:14,547 --> 00:15:17,326
"Trim the hedges, mow the
lawn, paint the patio furniture,
247
00:15:17,350 --> 00:15:20,796
wash the windows, clean out
the garage, scrub the denture cup."
248
00:15:20,820 --> 00:15:24,388
I added that. I hate doing it.
249
00:15:25,758 --> 00:15:27,770
This is too much. I
can't ask him to do this.
250
00:15:27,794 --> 00:15:29,037
Of course you can.
251
00:15:29,061 --> 00:15:31,573
Idle hands are the
devil's workshop.
252
00:15:31,597 --> 00:15:35,177
God, I wish I'd said that.
253
00:15:35,201 --> 00:15:38,347
I don't see how doing all these
chores is gonna make him feel loved.
254
00:15:38,371 --> 00:15:41,550
Look, Blanche, the one
thing that David has never had
255
00:15:41,574 --> 00:15:43,752
in his life is structure.
256
00:15:43,776 --> 00:15:46,422
Now, doing chores will
give him a little responsibility.
257
00:15:46,446 --> 00:15:48,924
He might even start
feeling good about himself.
258
00:15:48,948 --> 00:15:51,660
And start hating me if
I ask him to do all this!
259
00:15:51,684 --> 00:15:54,730
Now, listen, Blanche, you
do what is best for David,
260
00:15:54,754 --> 00:15:57,165
not what is easiest for you.
261
00:15:57,189 --> 00:16:00,536
Yeah, we had
chores on the farm...
262
00:16:00,560 --> 00:16:02,538
boys and girls.
263
00:16:02,562 --> 00:16:05,273
And when we finished, we had
such a feeling of accomplishment.
264
00:16:05,297 --> 00:16:09,010
We had to feed the chickens,
slop the hogs, muck the stalls.
265
00:16:09,034 --> 00:16:12,013
Please, I'm trying to eat here!
266
00:16:12,037 --> 00:16:14,015
And after I finished
all that, I still had to
267
00:16:14,039 --> 00:16:17,353
take care of Larry,
my one-eyed pig.
268
00:16:17,377 --> 00:16:21,245
What did you people do, run a
farm for handicapped animals?
269
00:16:25,150 --> 00:16:28,263
But you grew up in the
country. David's a city boy.
270
00:16:28,287 --> 00:16:29,965
Oh, wait now, Blanche, come on.
271
00:16:29,989 --> 00:16:33,068
I'm from New York. I did chores.
272
00:16:33,092 --> 00:16:35,270
I made the beds, I
washed the dishes,
273
00:16:35,294 --> 00:16:37,840
scoured the pots,
cleaned the bathroom,
274
00:16:37,864 --> 00:16:39,941
folded the laundry,
took out the garbage.
275
00:16:39,965 --> 00:16:43,111
My, my. Did you
attend a military school?
276
00:16:43,135 --> 00:16:46,548
No, she lived with me.
277
00:16:46,572 --> 00:16:49,752
Did they have chores in
Sicily? Are you kidding?
278
00:16:49,776 --> 00:16:52,488
They invented chores in Sicily.
279
00:16:52,512 --> 00:16:56,179
Crossing the street without getting
pregnant was a chore in Sicily.
280
00:17:00,286 --> 00:17:04,400
Rose, never
mention Sicily. Oh...
281
00:17:04,424 --> 00:17:07,803
Well, I guess when I was
little, I didn't have to do anything.
282
00:17:07,827 --> 00:17:10,138
And I raised my
daughter the same way.
283
00:17:10,162 --> 00:17:12,841
So that's why David is the
way he is now, so it's all my fault!
284
00:17:12,865 --> 00:17:16,244
Oh, now, Blanche. You
can't blame yourself for David.
285
00:17:16,268 --> 00:17:19,948
You're right. It's
my mother's fault.
286
00:17:19,972 --> 00:17:21,550
I am gonna give
this list to David
287
00:17:21,574 --> 00:17:24,520
and see that he
starts right away.
288
00:17:24,544 --> 00:17:27,088
How is it possible to
get pregnant in Sicily
289
00:17:27,112 --> 00:17:29,212
just by crossing the street?
290
00:17:32,885 --> 00:17:37,187
Cheap Chianti and
narrow streets. Ohh...
291
00:17:52,438 --> 00:17:55,506
If you wait a couple of minutes,
I'll make you some sandwiches.
292
00:17:58,978 --> 00:18:02,357
Where you going? I don't know.
293
00:18:02,381 --> 00:18:05,728
How you getting
there? I'll take a bus.
294
00:18:05,752 --> 00:18:09,532
I see. And when the bus
gets to you-don't-know-where,
295
00:18:09,556 --> 00:18:12,200
what will you do
then? Get a job.
296
00:18:12,224 --> 00:18:13,669
Really? Yeah.
297
00:18:13,693 --> 00:18:17,139
As what, Secretary of State?
298
00:18:17,163 --> 00:18:20,676
I gotta go. So you're
just gonna wimp out, huh?
299
00:18:20,700 --> 00:18:22,945
I'm not wimping out.
Well, what do you call this?
300
00:18:22,969 --> 00:18:25,915
Why should I stay here when
I got all this crappy stuff to do?
301
00:18:25,939 --> 00:18:27,917
And no one likes me anyway.
302
00:18:27,941 --> 00:18:32,121
You know, first of all, buddy
boy, life is full of crappy stuff to do.
303
00:18:32,145 --> 00:18:34,623
It's everywhere, so
you better get used to it.
304
00:18:34,647 --> 00:18:37,526
The President has
crappy stuff to do.
305
00:18:37,550 --> 00:18:41,730
Second of all, your
grandmother happens to like you.
306
00:18:41,754 --> 00:18:43,732
My mother likes you.
307
00:18:43,756 --> 00:18:47,636
She doesn't hit anyone unless
she really cares. Take it from me.
308
00:18:47,660 --> 00:18:50,439
And I happen to like you.
309
00:18:50,463 --> 00:18:53,909
My life stinks. I know.
310
00:18:53,933 --> 00:18:57,546
Things are tough at home
and that really does stink.
311
00:18:57,570 --> 00:18:59,548
But you have a choice.
312
00:18:59,572 --> 00:19:03,018
You can tough it out,
or you can let it beat you.
313
00:19:03,042 --> 00:19:06,455
But right now you're here.
And this doesn't have to stink.
314
00:19:06,479 --> 00:19:08,457
And if you stay and work at it
315
00:19:08,481 --> 00:19:10,525
and everything turns out,
316
00:19:10,549 --> 00:19:11,961
you'll have a place to visit
317
00:19:11,985 --> 00:19:14,663
when the things at
home really get to stink.
318
00:19:14,687 --> 00:19:17,099
I just can't, like,
come here whenever.
319
00:19:17,123 --> 00:19:20,903
You can just, like,
come here whenever.
320
00:19:20,927 --> 00:19:23,672
Well, I don't mind
the gardening,
321
00:19:23,696 --> 00:19:26,375
but it's, like, the
vacuuming I hate.
322
00:19:26,399 --> 00:19:29,678
That's, like, for girls.
Well, we can renegotiate.
323
00:19:29,702 --> 00:19:34,238
I'll do the vacuuming if
you'll, like, learn English.
324
00:19:36,609 --> 00:19:39,510
Come on, I'll fix you
something to eat.
325
00:19:43,082 --> 00:19:44,927
All right, now,
attention, everyone.
326
00:19:44,951 --> 00:19:46,962
I want to propose a toast.
327
00:19:46,986 --> 00:19:50,532
To Dorothy Zbornak, who
got an A in her French class,
328
00:19:50,556 --> 00:19:53,903
proving that you can
teach an old dog new tricks.
329
00:19:53,927 --> 00:19:57,161
And if anyone knows
about tricks... Ma!
330
00:20:00,666 --> 00:20:03,412
Thank you, ladies and gentleman.
331
00:20:03,436 --> 00:20:07,182
Or should I say, merci
beaucoup, mes amies.
332
00:20:07,206 --> 00:20:10,386
Oh, my, that was impressive!
333
00:20:10,410 --> 00:20:15,124
Jane Goodall once taught an
ape to rumba... that's impressive!
334
00:20:15,148 --> 00:20:18,060
Now I would like
to propose a toast.
335
00:20:18,084 --> 00:20:20,896
To David, who in the past week
336
00:20:20,920 --> 00:20:24,300
has proven that he
is one damn good kid.
337
00:20:24,324 --> 00:20:25,689
Hear, hear.
338
00:20:27,560 --> 00:20:30,639
You know, it's really
been interesting.
339
00:20:30,663 --> 00:20:32,674
I got hit, did chores,
340
00:20:32,698 --> 00:20:36,578
learned all about
handicapped animals.
341
00:20:36,602 --> 00:20:39,971
All in all, it hasn't
been half-bad.
342
00:20:41,607 --> 00:20:43,585
And if it's all right with you,
343
00:20:43,609 --> 00:20:46,310
I wouldn't mind
living here full-time.
344
00:20:51,117 --> 00:20:54,529
Well, I would certainly have to
discuss that with your parents.
345
00:20:54,553 --> 00:20:56,265
Oh, Mom and Dad will say yes.
346
00:20:56,289 --> 00:20:59,534
They'll be as happy
with the idea as I am.
347
00:20:59,558 --> 00:21:02,338
Well, I'm gonna
get some ice cream.
348
00:21:02,362 --> 00:21:05,607
Wait up! I'll show you
where I hide the good stuff.
349
00:21:05,631 --> 00:21:07,698
Call his mother!
350
00:21:09,402 --> 00:21:11,380
Blanche, what are we gonna do?
351
00:21:11,404 --> 00:21:14,916
Do you think I should call his
mother? I really think you should.
352
00:21:14,940 --> 00:21:17,052
All right, I will.
353
00:21:17,076 --> 00:21:20,389
I don't want to send him
back to an unhappy home,
354
00:21:20,413 --> 00:21:22,191
but we're grandmothers.
355
00:21:22,215 --> 00:21:25,861
It wouldn't be fair to be this
old and have to raise children.
356
00:21:25,885 --> 00:21:28,864
Hello, baby, it's Mama.
357
00:21:28,888 --> 00:21:30,866
Well, I'm fine,
honey. I'm just fine.
358
00:21:30,890 --> 00:21:33,435
I'm calling you about David.
359
00:21:33,459 --> 00:21:35,437
No, he's fine.
360
00:21:35,461 --> 00:21:38,374
Um, matter of fact, he's
so happy here, Janet, that...
361
00:21:38,398 --> 00:21:42,011
I've decided to keep
him and raise him myself.
362
00:21:42,035 --> 00:21:44,546
You heard me.
363
00:21:44,570 --> 00:21:47,316
Well, he says that you and
Michael spend so much time arguing,
364
00:21:47,340 --> 00:21:49,273
that you don't
have time for him.
365
00:21:50,876 --> 00:21:52,976
Don't you take that
tone with me, missy.
366
00:21:54,380 --> 00:21:56,680
Yes, I realize
you're his mother...
367
00:21:58,984 --> 00:22:02,697
No, I don't suppose I can stop you if
you insist on coming and getting him.
368
00:22:02,721 --> 00:22:06,035
But you let me tell you this... if
you and Michael don't straighten up
369
00:22:06,059 --> 00:22:08,904
and give that boy the love
and attention he deserves,
370
00:22:08,928 --> 00:22:12,129
I will kick your uppity butt
till hell won't have it again!
371
00:22:17,736 --> 00:22:21,417
She'll call us right back. She
has to wake up the Yankee.
372
00:22:21,441 --> 00:22:25,654
Well done, Blanche.
Oh, absolutely. Nice bluff.
373
00:22:25,678 --> 00:22:28,257
That was no bluff. I
meant every word of it.
374
00:22:28,281 --> 00:22:30,759
I would love to have a
chance to raise David.
375
00:22:30,783 --> 00:22:34,651
I might make up for the
mess I made with Janet.
376
00:22:40,826 --> 00:22:43,839
I still wish you'd let us
drive you to the airport.
377
00:22:43,863 --> 00:22:46,941
Oh, my cab's already here. Besides,
I've seen the way you all drive!
378
00:22:46,965 --> 00:22:49,411
Oh!
379
00:22:49,435 --> 00:22:51,713
I'm gonna miss you guys.
380
00:22:51,737 --> 00:22:54,783
It was nice of your folks to
let you join them in Hawaii.
381
00:22:54,807 --> 00:22:57,352
Yeah, they've never ignored
me on an island before.
382
00:22:57,376 --> 00:22:59,488
David, you listen to me.
383
00:22:59,512 --> 00:23:01,690
Now, they want the three of
you to start over from scratch,
384
00:23:01,714 --> 00:23:03,825
so the least you can
do is meet them halfway.
385
00:23:03,849 --> 00:23:07,328
I'll try. I bet it'll be
easier than you think.
386
00:23:07,352 --> 00:23:09,865
Yeah, especially now that
you have an alternative.
387
00:23:09,889 --> 00:23:13,435
If things get too tough at home, you
can always come here and live with us.
388
00:23:15,694 --> 00:23:17,672
Well... Bye, Grandma.
389
00:23:17,696 --> 00:23:19,974
Bye, honey.
390
00:23:19,998 --> 00:23:22,232
Dorothy. Bye, love.
391
00:23:23,969 --> 00:23:25,903
Rose.
392
00:23:29,942 --> 00:23:31,875
See ya, slugger.
393
00:23:39,384 --> 00:23:41,496
Bye, darling. Bye.
394
00:23:41,520 --> 00:23:44,455
Run, run, run! Go.
395
00:23:48,093 --> 00:23:50,026
Oh, I hope he's
gonna be all right.
396
00:23:51,797 --> 00:23:53,909
Oh, Dorothy that
was so sweet of you,
397
00:23:53,933 --> 00:23:57,612
telling him he could come
live with us. I meant it.
398
00:23:57,636 --> 00:24:00,014
It's gonna be awfully quiet
around here without him.
399
00:24:00,038 --> 00:24:03,718
I'll say. No more
listening to Dorothy snore!
400
00:24:03,742 --> 00:24:05,720
Ma, I do not snore!
401
00:24:05,744 --> 00:24:09,304
Please, I had to turn you from the
window so you wouldn't inhale the drapes!